Turning 27
It can be difficult to begin something again after some time has passed. Though, it’s really as simple as picking up right where we left off. Oftentimes, we make things more complicated than they need to be. For many reasons, I’ve avoided writing the happenings as of late but I’m ready to begin again.
I’d like this to be a succinct summary of the year thus far. My earliest memory of ringing in the new year of 2020 was standing on a ladder in the library, repairing the cracks in the plaster walls. I watched on my phone as happy people in Time Square sang, Imagine by John Lennon. I wondered to myself what the coming year would bring. It was a question I asked myself for as long as I can remember, but the answer to my asking this time returned with a weighty ominousness.
This year, indeed brought with it a string of unfortunate happenings, yet I maintain there were many good memories made too.
End of May was hard and I consider it with mixed emotions. Lying on the grass, unsure of what to do or where to go next, I decidedly placed a tangible reminder to myself on my forearm. Memorial Day will always be a day that I remember to turn my face toward the light in hard times.
August held some of the best days of the year. It was a family vacation spent on familiar sandy beaches. I recall the song, Carolina on My Mind by James Taylor which always pulls me back to those simple, beautiful moments.
The last day of August was marked with two faint pink lines that was both unexpected and nerve wracking. Fear and uncertainty gave way to hopeful excitement and acceptance. Then a Friday came that changed it as quickly as it began and a wave of grief has been washing in and receding over me ever since. It’s true that time has a way of healing life’s hurts. Nonetheless, I’ll always consider my first glimpse of motherhood to be made by the sweet life of my Ella Juliet.
In terms of work, my employment at The Salvation Army has shaped me in such a way to truly take nothing for granted, for there are many worse off than I. Serving hot coffee and breakfast bags in the morning has been a continual reminder each day to see every person as one with a powerful story to share.
Two revelations that have come with time is how appreciative to be of the small things of life. And the other is a deep sense to fulfill my calling to help those that have no place to call home.
In terms of the world as we know it today, I am convinced more than ever that the Lord’s return is soon upon us. And in that knowing, resides my hope when everything else seems lost.
Gavin & I are still pursuing our dream of this home and property. New electric and overhead lighting have transformed much of the house. The claw foot tub is currently on saw horses being refurbished for the bathroom and the quest of clearing around the pond has been our outside priority for the past couple weekends. I find solace in the work and a sense of pride in the transformation that’s made when we work together on our shared vision.
This evening, I conclude with nothing but gratitude in my heart and a fullness of love felt by family. I sit now, in quiet solitude, by our first fire made of the season, resting in new cozy attire and sipping a glass of delicious red wine. I am enjoying the heartfelt thoughtfulness of each of the loved ones today and each day as I walk through this life. And I am thankful for the opportunity to continue on, one year older.
I am a blessed women, indeed.
